Friday, June 23, 2017

LIFE



Life is about love, connection, gratitude, 
growth, change, acceptance...

Thursday, June 22, 2017

An authentic life



If we have the good fortune to discover the things 
that speak to our soul, we then, must find the courage to 
create a life that represents what we love...

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Heart wide open



When we let life tug on our heartstrings,
it becomes a strand of precious little moments... 

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Honoring ourselves


Meet Winston. He is seven months old..


The last six weeks I've struggled with making the decision whether to keep the little Siamese kitten I had adopted. I knew that I wasn't happy, but I felt guilty... so I continued to try to make it work until I could no longer ignore the inner disturbance... 
It was time to surrender ... I had given it my best...

So I let go...

And in letting go, I promised myself that if I were to spend the next 15+ years with a kitty, it would be a match for both of us. Before the day was over, I got an email from a girl looking to re-home her cat. When I saw the photo him (Winston), I wept tears of joy. In being honest with myself about my own needs and letting go, the door opened for a new beginning... 

Monday, June 19, 2017

The gift of peace


What I have learned recently about myself is that I not only love the quiet, but I need lots of it... The experience of living with a kitten the past few weeks has had some joyful moments... but the everyday care of a young kitten doesn't match what I desire most...

I'm grateful for this lesson that shown me where I am at today. I'm grateful that I've learned to listen and honor my own feelings. I'm grateful that I give myself choices today. I won't swallow my feelings or force something to fit that doesn't. And best of all, I don't feel guilty or have any regrets. There were no mistakes made, only lessons to learn...

Sunday, June 18, 2017

The lesson continues...




One of the gifts that working on my codependency issues has given me is a good intuition and the ability to be honest with myself about what I know to be true... I feel so grateful that I won't let myself be trapped by guilt anymore. If something doesn't feel right, I have to examine it and make changes if I need to... 

"Sweet Pea" was a hard test because my heart was in there. But I know that she will have a better life in a home with more activity than mine... 

Next lesson - her brother "Lil Boy Blu" has come to live with us... To be continued...

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Life lessons - Sweet Pea


Because my emotional needs were ignored as a child, I spent a great deal of my adult life continuing to ignore myself. My primary focus was making others happy, tending to their feelings, and often putting on my superwoman cape to rescue someone... All of which gave me a feeling of being needed... and being needed gave me a sense of value/worthiness. 

It has taken a long time and a lot of work on myself to reach a place where rescuing or feeling like it's my job to make others happy, doesn't feel right anymore. I have loosened the chain of codependency...

However, the lessons continue to come...

Many of you know that I adopted an adorable little kitty named Sweet Pea. We immediately bonded and were off to a good start. But after a week or so, she became very clingy and a bit demanding... Because there are no other pets or children to play with in the house, I became the focus of her world. Becoming the focus of someone's world is an arena that I have worked hard to step away from... so some of the initial joy I felt with Sweet Pea began to diminish. It didn't help that she brought biting and scratching into our relationship. 

Though I have tried to ignore my own truth, yesterday I had an honest moment with myself. The truth is that Sweet Pea needs a home with more interaction... So with a heavy heart, I returned her to her original owner. I miss her already, but the changes I've worked hard to make in my life have brought me to a place where I value freedom and peace above all else... I appreciate everything that Sweet Pea came to teach me about myself, and fully trust that Sweet Pea's needs will be met in her new home...