Saturday, June 17, 2017

Life lessons - Sweet Pea


Because my emotional needs were ignored as a child, I spent a great deal of my adult life continuing to ignore myself. My primary focus was making others happy, tending to their feelings, and often putting on my superwoman cape to rescue someone... All of which gave me a feeling of being needed... and being needed gave me a sense of value/worthiness. 

It has taken a long time and a lot of work on myself to reach a place where rescuing or feeling like it's my job to make others happy, doesn't feel right anymore. I have loosened the chain of codependency...

However, the lessons continue to come...

Many of you know that I adopted an adorable little kitty named Sweet Pea. We immediately bonded and were off to a good start. But after a week or so, she became very clingy and a bit demanding... Because there are no other pets or children to play with in the house, I became the focus of her world. Becoming the focus of someone's world is an arena that I have worked hard to step away from... so some of the initial joy I felt with Sweet Pea began to diminish. It didn't help that she brought biting and scratching into our relationship. 

Though I have tried to ignore my own truth, yesterday I had an honest moment with myself. The truth is that Sweet Pea needs a home with more interaction... So with a heavy heart, I returned her to her original owner. I miss her already, but the changes I've worked hard to make in my life have brought me to a place where I value freedom and peace above all else... I appreciate everything that Sweet Pea came to teach me about myself, and fully trust that Sweet Pea's needs will be met in her new home... 

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