Finding my way

I spent years trying to live the white picket fence dream; children, husband, house, successful career. Though I had it all, I could never escape a feeling of painful emptiness. Don't get me wrong, my children have been my greatest blessing, my career amazing, and my husband was a good man. Though I was grateful for what I had, I knew from somewhere deep in my soul that something was missing...

I continued to aimlessly flounder through the days until my life took an unexpected turn. Illness forced me to leave a job that I not only loved, but it gave me an identity and financial security. Following that, my daughter, husband, and brother died. And because I was still so sick, I couldn't manage taking care of my home anymore, so I was forced to let that go too. A lot of letting go, a lot of grief, suffering, fear, uncertainty...

I had no choice but to let myself fall again and again into a dark abyss. Seemed like I would begin to crawl out only to fall back in again. I couldn't get my footing. All sense of safety was gone. I was powerless to do anything but surrender. But somewhere in the darkness, I feel in love with God, the healing process, and a life that fulfilled my soul...

***

For women who are interested in learning about "A Course in Miracles", 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/creativehealingwomenswellness/

Finding more of myself

There have been several times in my life when I felt like Humpty Dumpty falling off the wall. But every time I pieced my life back together, something remarkable shifted and changed inside of me. The powerlessness of illness, the pain of loss and sorrow, the hopelessness that suffering brings, and darkness with it's uncertainty, have all been my teachers. They taught me how to be more selfless and compassionate in healthy ways (not the co-dependent way). I learned lessons about patience, forgiveness, worthiness, self-care, and most of all, unconditional love... This gut-wrenching process was ego-deflating, lonely, and frightening, but it humbled me, healed my heart in unexpected ways, and set me free...

If you would like to join "Women Walking a Spiritual Path" on Facebook, click link:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/creativehealingforwomen/

Faith in the Unknown

Years ago I had a spiritual experience that changed the course of my life forever. Not only did I get a deep glimpse of a world without pain, but I opened up to God so completely that my life ceased to be my own. I have spent the last twenty years navigating a path that still remains a mystery to me, yet I continue to trust it with my heart and soul... 

A soft heart

Unconditional love is patient, tolerant, forgiving...
It doesn't seek special relationships. 
It is generously extends itself to everyone.

To give pure love, we must first, love ourselves. 
Otherwise the love we give to others 

is limited, often painful, and comes with strings...

Looking inward

Saw these on vacation..

The artist is Emerson

Love his stuff...

When children play pretend games and are swept away by their imaginations, it's endearing to watch. But when people carry this behavior into their adulthood, it's not cute and there are consequences for it. Creating a make-believe story about our lives rather than looking deeper at the truth, is called living in denial. There is nothing empowering about seeing life through an illusionary lens. If we aren't willing to face ourselves honestly, we can be assured that avoidance is the way we are trying to manage our pain. It will never work! Avoiding our authentic feelings only leads to numbness, judgment, unresolved anger, jealousy and insecurity, fear...

Contentment

The mind searches for something to fulfill it

while the soul rests because it feels no lack...

A Greater love...

There is a love that is far greater than the personal love 

we experience with our family, friends, community... 

The love I'm speaking of incubuses all of life... 

It is consistent, infinite, unconditional...
It witnesses everything as God...

Seeing the beauty...

An open heart doesn’t see things as good or bad, 
right or wrong. It accepts everything as it is...

Holding too tightly

Truth isn’t always easy. It smashes our fantasies, 

but the reason we create fantasy stories to begin with 

is that we are unhappy with the truth. 

Better to make friends with the truth 

than lie to ourselves.

Some simple truths...

Accept the fact that you're not perfect and that others may not always approve of you. Love yourself enough to be okay with that. Don't engage in self-destructive behaviors, dysfunctional relationships, or negative self-talk. Know that love is a balancing act: how much to give, when to hang in, when to let go. Don't look for someone to make you feel happy. People can only enhance our happiness...

Unconditional love

When we let go of judgement,

we experience everything as God.

Courage

Let go of fear; fear of change, 

fear of what tomorrow will bring, 

fear of being powerless...

Keeping it real

Picture yourself as a woman who 

doesn't apologize for who she is,

 expresses herself honestly,

lives without pretenses...

Acceptance

When we surrender to life’s plans,

we erase pain and struggle.

Soulfulness

The mind is always busy seeking 

something to make itself feel good, 

but the soul's desire is to be nurtured 

by the fullness of nothing...

An open heart

Gosh, he is cute...

and kinda looks real...

When you have healed so deeply 

that all that remains is love,

your heart is ready to lend itself 

to the world…

Unconditional love

The more comfortable we are in our own skin, 

the more we can let others be who they are.

With new eyes...

The world is not the problem. 

The problem is how we see the world…

The color of your soul

There is a beautiful path…

one that leads to your soul.

But you may have to travel

 the difficult path first. 

Pain is often the catalyst 

that shatters our ego/ self-will.
It is only when self-will has dissolved,
that the path can be found...

Words of inspiration

My first time using a photograph that isn't mine.
Love how it looks, but feels odd, not sure why...

When I first started my spiritual journey,  I clung to the words of teachers like Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson... They inspired me. But somewhere along the path, I began to find my own words... words that resonated in my soul... words that expressed my truth, who I am, how I feel...

Cleaning up the past

In order to release the past, we have to clean it up first. 
We need to do is make amends to those we've harmed. 
It doesn't matter if our actions were deliberate or not. 
Our conscience will not rest until we make our wrongs right. 
Know that pride and justification are not your friends. 

The color of our world

Doing some window shopping

Love to look at store signs

Saw this at Macy's

For a happy life, we... 

practice good self-care,

 are forgiving of ourselves and others, 

let faith carry us through our day, 

push through fear by taking risks, 

keep our minds and hearts are open. 

Ending the confusion

Our minds give us many different, 

conflicting, confusing answers

because it operates from fear.

When we learn to quiet our minds, 

we will get good direction...

The heart creates memories,

the mind creates dissension... 

The end of drama

One of my creations. The idea came from a greeting card I made.

We invite chaos into our lives as a way to avoid our unresolved emotional pain. The more distraction we surround ourselves with, the more numb we become to our own truth. I used to be a rescuer. I didn't know it was an avoidance. I thought I was being helpful. 

I ignored how stressful it was and how futile it always ended being. The kindest thing we can do for ourselves is to step away from drama. Fixing people is an addiction and an avoidance. Better to look inward...

Looking back...

My garden is blossoming through the summer heat... 

lots of fresh mint, lavender, rose-scented geraniums, rosemary...

When I started my blog five years ago, I couldn't have imagined that I would still be writing it today. It has been a heart-opening experience for someone who at one time would not have shared herself so publicly. Blogging is like letting everyone read your diary. Initially, I felt extremely vulnerable. Thank goodness I never let fear or insecurity stand in my way.

Here's one of my earliest entries:

Things I've Learned
I’ve learned the world is a safe refuge

 so I can stop being afraid of life.

I’ve learned we’re all doing our best 

 so I need to give people room for errs.

I’ve learned that being miracle-minded 

is simply seeing life in a new light.

I’ve learned that kind words can heal.

I’ve learned to trust the journey.

The true gifts

 Feel blessed to live 5 minutes from downtown shopping and the beach

The true gifts in life are simplicity, contentment, 

love, gratitude, forgiveness, peace, acceptance…

Keeping it real

Picture yourself as a woman who,

by prying herself loose of fear, 

has rid herself of falseness. 

***

If you would like to join 
a closed women's support group on Facebook 
regarding the topic of spirituality, click below

https://www.facebook.com/groups/creativehealingforwomen/

or a beginners group for women 
regarding A Course in Miracles
 https://www.facebook.com/groups/creativehealingwomenswellness/

Freeing yourself from judgment

Found this cute mermaid on a store window...

Picture yourself as a woman who 

doesn't apologize for who she is,

 expresses herself honestly,

lives without pretenses...