Facing Fear

 Because of the physical abuse I experienced as a child, the sensitive little girl inside me grew up afraid of physical pain.

I didn’t realize until a few years ago that I was still carrying that fear.

And then, almost as if my body was asking to be heard, the nerve pain arrived—first in my knees, and years later, in my bladder.

For a long time, I believed the pain was something to fix.

Today, I see something different.

I see a child who is thrashing because of fear.

I have faced fear before. I faced it when I entered recovery. I faced it when I began inner child work. I faced it when I allowed myself to grieve the losses that shaped my life.

And each time, I learned the same lesson:

The only way through fear is to face it.

I won’t pretend this is easy.

It isn’t.

This is a deep challenge. Perhaps my second deepest.

But somewhere inside, I know that the frightened little girl who has spent a lifetime bracing for pain can learn something new.

She can learn that pain is not punishment.

She can learn that fear does not have to lead.

And she can learn that she is safe.

I believe it is time.

Time to stop running.

Time to trust.

Time to walk through fear and discover what waits on the other side.