I'll redo an art art piece several times until it feels right.
Mixed media art is forgiving, easy to correct. This one took several tries.
It's the same way with writing every morning. It could take up to 5 hours to finish a blog,
I'll rewrite a message until every word reflects my truest thoughts and feelings. It forces me to do honest soul searching on a daily basis. Blogging is really just allowing people to read my journal.
At one time, shame would've prevented me from exposing my flawed life. I used to be extremely guarded, only showing you the parts of myself I thought you'd accept.
Also, I've had a core belief all my life that told me being proud of your hard efforts and accomplishments, and sharing them, was bragging and hurtful to others. For many years, I kept me quiet, living small, not letting my light shine. I was a great cheerleader for others, but abandoned myself. Once again, it was shame that squashed my spirit.
Though my intention when I started writing a blog was to inspire, it's becoming clearer that I'm also healing old wounds. There's still a woman/child within, who wants to hide her imperfections, as well as her gifts. She's more comfortable with dimming her lights. She fears being judged. Judged for being broken, judged for being healed. She would risk being suffocated to be loved. But I'm not willing to live by her rules anymore. Abandonment scarred her, I trust love will heal her.
Blogging has exposed these hidden truths. It's really challenged me. And to be honest, I've wanted to quit. Thank God I have the wisdom to know that discovering this uncharted territory is exactly what I needed. For now, I'll continue writing while comforting the part of me who fears success as much as she fears failure.
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Capturing the sweet essence of life
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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So.. Sail away from the safe harbor. ...Explore. Dream. Discover. Mark Twain
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"As a dreamer, I'm not discouraged by...
I will flourish through achievement, as well as my mistakes"
