Making My Own Choices

 Too much of my life has been based on what other people wanted, how they felt, or what their needs were.

There is no blame behind my words. I have come to understand that, at a very young age, I learned that in order to survive in my childhood home, I had to put my own needs aside and focus on my parents and theirs.

Over time, that became a pattern throughout my life. I became accustomed to considering what everyone else needed before asking myself what I wanted.

And even though I’ve been in recovery for a long time, it took me years to give myself permission to focus on my own needs and desires.

Today, I’m pretty clear about what those needs are. I also understand that what I want or what feels right for me may not always align with what other people think.

And that’s okay.

I’m learning that making my own choices doesn’t mean I don’t care about others. It means their opinions and expectations don’t automatically take priority over my own needs.

I don’t need everyone to agree with me. I don’t need to explain every decision or feel guilty because someone else might choose differently.

I’ve spent a lot of years learning to listen to others. Now I listen to myself.

Today, I’m choosing me. I’m trusting my decisions and believing that I know what is right for my life.

And that is a freedom I’m no longer willing to give away.