A warrior's heart

I wish I'd known from the beginning that I was born a strong woman.

What a difference it would have made!

I wish I'd known that I was born a courageous woman;

I've spent so much of my life cowering.

How many conversations would I not only started...

  but finished if I'd known I possessed a warrior's heart?

I wish I'd known that I'd been born to take on the world;

I wouldn't have run from it for so long,

but run to it with open arms."

 

Sarah Ban Breathnach

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“When I get lonely these days, I think: So BE lonely, Liz.
Learn your way around loneliness.
Make a map of it.
 Sit with it, for once in your life.
Welcome to the human experience.
But never again use another person's body or emotions...
 as a scratching post for your own unfulfilled yearnings.”

― Elizabeth Gilbert

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"My arms are open wide"

The perfect mate

 

I have friends who want to find their perfect mate.

 

I remember that longing feeling!

 

 And I did eventually meet someone to share my life with.

 

But my greatest joy was to be able to love myself.

 

Looking back, the longing ache to find a soul mate came from an emptiness inside me.

 

I was sure that the right man would complete me...make me feel fulfilled and happy. 

 

I wanted someone who would help me escape my pain...the pain of low self-worth. 

 

But that wasn't possible!

 

I first had to learn to love and accept myself.

 

It's been a journey...a process...

 

But one with a happy ending...

 

*****

 

My office/meditation room

It's very girlie...

My greeting cards and books

 

*****

 

To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.

 

Oscar Wilde

"I love and accept myself "

Telling our story

 

We all have a story...

 

The first time I shared my story, I was trembling inside, secretly worried what people would think of me. My life story was pretty messy. Initially, I felt raw and ashamed. Being so honest made me feel exposed and vulnerable. Yet at the same time, I felt this incredible sense of freedom. Finding the courage to do this was no small feat. 

I can look back now and see how healing it was to share myself so intimately.

 

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Share Your Story with Me

Tell me about your journey...
your biggest hurtles...
your saddest moments...
what makes you laugh...
what makes you cry...
tell me if you ever feel lost...
alone...
afraid.
We aren't much different you know.
We all have a story.
Will you risk being vulnerable...
 to share yours?

***
 

"I share myself freely with others"

 

Doing an inventory

Doing a honest inventory of yourself will help you to recognize if you've slammed the door on someone in an unreasonable way, someone you may have once cared about. When you closed your heart off to them, it numbed your feelings, making it easier to let them go.

 

But it also left you hard-hearted. Your heart became wounded.

 

You heal by letting your heart become soft and forgiving. This doesn't necessarily mean you'll resume the relationship again. Sometimes we need to walk away...but let's make sure we've done it in a kind, forgiving manner...holding no grudges.

Be willing to look for a new perspective. What was your part?

Make peace with everyone who's shared your journey...each person has brought you a gift, a lesson...No more finger-pointing...all is forgiven.

 

*****

 

 

When you are offended at any man's fault,
turn to yourself and study your own failings.
Then you will forget your anger.

~ Epictetus ~

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"My heart is soft and forgiving"

Forgiveness

 

To know true peace, you must forgive everyone...no matter what they've done...a hardened heart will never be peaceful. You will be stuck...a part of you closed off...building a wall around your heart...judgement will suffocate your ability to love.

If there is resistance to being forgiving, look deeper...it could mean that you haven't forgiven yourself for something...when you forgive yourself, forgiveness for others comes more easily.

 

Judgment of other's is a mirror...hold it to your face...look closely...what are they showing you about yourself that you don't like...you are still angry at yourself for what...?

 

It's time to move on...let the past go...forgive yourself...you did the best you could at the time...we've all made mistakes...some small ones, some BIG ones...it's okay...sometimes the only way we can improve on ourselves is to make those mistakes.

 

If you've hurt someone, make your amends...be humble...wipe the slate clean...forgive everything...move forward. You'll enjoy the freedom that follows forgiveness...your heart will smile again.

 

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Life is a gift...it offer us the privilege,

opportunity, and responsibility to give something back

by becoming more.

 

Anthony Robbins

 

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"All is forgiven"

 

Love

My friend Alicia opening gifts at her xmas party...she loves to get presents

My dear friend has found love....I'm so happy for the both of them

 

*****

 

This holiday I was reminded again and again in so many ways how many people I feel connected to...family, friends...people that tug at my heartstrings....a special feeling that connects us.

 

 I feel truly BLESSED and THANKFUL...

The best gift is never what's under the xmas tree. It's what we feel inside when we share ourselves with others...with our hearts wide open...unconditionally...with love, acceptance, friendship, doing acts of kindness for others...
 

*****

 

 

There are many things in life

that will catch your eye,

but only a few will catch your heart ...pursue those.

 

Author Unknown

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Love is blind only to the eyes.

The heart sees everything clearly.

Author Unknown

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"I am surrounded by love"

A peaceful holiday

 

Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the house,

 not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse...

 

So far, this has been a peaceful holiday.

No fuss, no worry...

Every year I've worked at cutting back the Christmas stress...

the stress of doing too much...

wanting things to be perfect.

 

I've learned that the part of me that sought perfection...

 was actually my wounded inner child...
who wanted love, approval, and to make others happy.

I didn't believe I was enough...

or what I did for others wasn't enough either.

So I overcompensated,
losing touch with my own needs in the process,

especially during the holidays.

 

Today I know "I am enough".

The old compulsion to overdo has disappeared.
A true miracle!!!

 

My wish for you this year...

is to know how special you are.

May your holidays be blessed with the truest gift-

"The Gift of Love"

 

****

 

Pippi nosing around my art table...

 

*****

 

Just like a sunbeam can't separate itself from the sun,
and a wave can't separate itself from the ocean,
we can't separate ourselves from one another.
We are all part of a vast sea of love...”

 

Marianne Williamson

 

 

"My life is rich"

Beginning again

We all get the chance to begin again...

to erase yesterdays errors...

to start fresh each day...

to learn new lessons.

We come to new understandings.

We accept our inadequacies, our mistakes, our humanity.

 We sweep away old ways that no longer work.

 Through trial and error...

we are busy creating better lives for ourselves.

And most of all, we forgive our yesterdays.

*****
 

 

“True forgiveness is when you can say,
"Thank you for that experience.”
― Oprah Winfrey

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"Making mistakes is a way I learn and grow"

 

Sharing with others

 

For years, I suffered quietly from low self-esteem, loneliness, hopelessness... I put on a false mask of happiness...ashamed to show others I was hurting.

I know I'm not the only one...

I believe there are more people suffering in silence than not. If you're one of those people, talk to someone about it...don't suffer alone...sharing will help you.

We all need a comforting shoulder to lean on sometimes...being too self-sufficient only isolates you...keeps you stuck. You may tell yourself that others don't care, but they do.

 

For me, it was shame that held me back from talking about my feelings. I was taught as child to keep my feelings to myself...no one wanted to hear them...to just suck it up. That message was damaging. It's not the way I do things anymore...sharing my pain is therapeutic...necessary for my well-being and yours too.

Reach out...let someone help you...sometimes the hardest thing

we have to do is also the right thing we need to do...find the courage, practice good self-care, put an end to suffering in silence.

 

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“I am lonely, yet not everybody will do.

I don't know why,

some people fill the gaps

and others emphasize my loneliness...

― Anais Nin

 

*****

 

 

"The world is a safe and loving place"

Quieting our mind

 

Isn't it crazy how our minds are always spinning stories in our head? Most of the stories aren't even true. They're imaginary scenarios that our minds spend hours entertaining. And how many of those stories are scary ones? I don't know about you, but I don't watch horror movies. So why would we want to scare ourselves by playing frightening, untrue stories in our minds?

 

My guess is this; habit and ego/fear.

We get in the habit of thinking too much...listening to the chattering stories. If you're fearful by nature, the stories won't be positive ones.

Often our thoughts are useless. Don't believe all your thoughts.

Stop the stories when you catch yourself playing them.

Thinking blocks you from using your heart and intuition.

Find nourishing things that will help quiet your busy mind.

******

 

“Silence is the language of God,
all else is poor translation.”

―  Rumi

 

*****

 

 

 "I will make quiet time for myself"

 

Good self-care

 My sister's storefront...love the paintings on it.

 

When I think of certain foods I ate as child, I get a warm, fuzzy feeling and my mouth starts to water. I remember dad making home-made taffy, grandpa frying morel mushrooms for breakfast (at my request), mom's tiny wreath-shaped butter cookies she made every Christmas, covered with colored sprinkles and of course, grandma's famous pineapple sugar cookies.

 

Oh yum.. The joy they brought...

No doubt, there's a child in me who still longs for her favorite things. But reality is, sugar and fried food aren't my friends anymore. They have a negative affect on my body.

 

So I had to say goodbye to old habits...trading taffy for ginger roasted beets...butter cookies for kale marinated in lime juice...sugar cookies for raw cookies (made with nuts, agave and coconut).

 

I'm don't feel deprieved though. I've discovered how much I actually love to eat this way, and more than that, I love how it makes my body feel. 

 

So life is good in the veggie lane... 

 

P.S. I forgot to mention that I make my own ice cream without fat or refined sugars. It's made from frozen bananas. Yummmmm.......

 

*****

 

 From my sister's garden

 

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon. 

 

~Doug Larson

***

"I remember to nourish my body"

Love and acceptance

 My niece Chloe (photo taken by my niece Joanna)

 

*****

 

True joy comes from within.

  External things will bring us pleasure,

but it doesn't last for long.

 

I spent a lifetime chasing happiness...

without little success.

 

I first, had to get happy with myself by...

learning to love and accept the person I was,

forgiving my past mistakes,

and ceasing all negative self-talk.

 

Where does your happiness come from?
Do you look for others to make you happy?
And the BIG question is: do you love yourself?
 

*****

 

 

 Our wounds are often the openings into the best
and most beautiful part of us.”

― David Richo

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"I love & accept myself"

Reaching our highest potential

I don't know where my son was at when this was photo was taken, but what a view...

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“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine...

 

Marianne Williamson

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I've read this many times over the years... It helped me to recognize my fears. Not just

 fear of failure, but fear of success. This comes from unworthiness...being afraid others wouldn't like me...having been taught in childhood that feeling good about yourself was bragging...something to be ashamed of... so I kept quiet about my achievements...let others shine brighter. I've been working on this for awhile with success. I still have more work to do but I have finally given up settling for living small.

 

We all have the potential to do great things; God doesn't play favorites. But we have to

believe in ourselves first...

 

******

 

 

Listen to your heart above all other voices."

 

~ Marta Kagan

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"I believe in myself"

 

The simple things

I love and appreciate simple things like...

 

A walk on the beach...

Fresh blueberry pancakes sprinkled with powdered sugar...

The smell of magnolia flowers...

Snuggling in bed with my cat and a good book...

Solitude...

Family time...

Girl dates...

Cooking healthy meals...

Going to the library...

Riding my bike...

Blogging, creating, art...

A date with my partner...

Photography...

Afternoon naps...

Giving to others, service work...


What simple things do you love...things that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside...making your heart smile?

******

 

 

“When you do things from your soul,

you feel a river moving in you...

 

Rumi

 

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"I appreciate even the simplest things"