When It’s Hard to Let Go

 There are times in life when we are called to let go.

Sometimes we know it long before we are willing to do it.

Two moments stand out to me.

The first was just before I got sober.

I had tried many times to quit and failed.

But eventually, I reached a point where the pain of continuing was greater than the pain of letting go.

That moment was a blessing.

Nothing short of a miracle.

The other time was with my daughter.

For eight years, I held on tightly while she struggled with addiction.

There was no way I was going to let go.

I was determined to find a way to save her.

I’m not sure that was what she wanted.

But I couldn’t imagine doing anything else.

Until one day, the pain of holding on became too much.

I had become spiritually, emotionally, and physically sick.

I had tried everything I knew to try.

There was simply nothing left.

I had to make the most unselfish decision of my life.

I had to stop rescuing my daughter.

Two weeks later, she was gone.

Forever.

I don’t think there is a harder kind of letting go than that.

But letting go doesn’t mean I stopped loving her.

It meant I finally understood that I could not save someone who didn’t want to be saved.

Sometimes love holds on.

Sometimes love releases.

And sometimes the hardest act of love is opening our hands when every part of us wants to keep holding on.