Waking up

 

We're either asleep or mindful and awake.
Depending on what we choose,
we move towards freedom
or we live in a state of confusion.
We may unconsciously choose confusion
because mindfulness shines the light 
on all the things we're afraid to look at. 

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"I believe in infinite possibilities"

Freedom from the past

When you let go of all the illusions...

 you've been clinging to for safety, 

all the sorrow you've carried for so long,

will have the freedom to express itself.

*****

"All your past is gone except for the beauty of it"

- A Course in Miracles

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A better life

 

We all need balance. What I mean by balance is that our inner life (how we feel inside) is as rich as our outer life. There was a time when my outer life looked very full and complete but inside I was bankrupt. I kept this a secret for many years, playing the game of "I'm okay". There came a time though, when I could still fool others, but couldn't lie to myself anymore. I had to get honest.

 

It has taken a lot of determination to move from the shallow pond into deeper, unknown waters. It has taken time to learn what loving myself means, to stop looking for others to complete me, and to quiet the ache in me that I had carelessly ignored for so long. I had fruitlessly sought happiness by filling my life with busyness, fixing others, achieving, striving, and hustling for love and acceptance. All which failed, over and over again.

 

It is only in finding the courage to be deeply honest with ourselves that we begin to face the truth about how we feel inside. Honesty is key that begins to unlock the door to freedom.

 

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Having faith

 

“I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going.

And I have trained myself to love it.

Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight,

that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight.

And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to.

But the miracle is in the unfolding of the wings.

You may not know where you're going,

but you know that so long as you spread your wings,

the winds will carry you.” 

 
― C. JoyBell C.

 

*****

 

 

Freedom

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go;

simply for the reason that they are heavy.

So let them go, let go of them.

I tie no weights to my ankles.” 

 
― C. JoyBell C.

 

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The freedom to be you

...refuse to diminish your life
 

so others will feel better.
 

Bring the fullness of your years,
 

experience, and wisdom into each relationship.
 

Expect others to be touched, challenged,
 

and changed by your presence in their life.

Patricia Lynn Reilly

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Forgiving the past

 

She tossed out her collection

 

of hurts and grievances.

*****

 

Picture yourself...

Picture yourself as a woman

who is as fierce as she is humble.

Through perseverance,

she achieves great things

with a gentle heart.

*****

Getting more real

 

 

Do you often find yourself disappointed or hurt in relationships?

Do you choose broken people, thinking you can change them?

When you do, you set yourself up for future problems.

The best thing is to choose those who are genuine.

But know that in choosing genuineness,
it will force you to become more genuine too.

If you're used to hiding parts of yourself (wearing a mask),
this will not be easy.

You may have a fear of being judged for who you are.

You don't feel good enough so you try to be someone you're not...
so others will like you. 

The only way though, to create an authentic life...
 is love and accept all the interesting aspects that make you unique.

You begin the journey to authenticity by choosing those...
 who risk showing you who they are.
 They will help you to feel safe enough to be your truest self.
 

*****



Claiming the gift of freedom

 I'm still playing around with creating patterns from my greeting cards

It is only in releasing everything we're attached to...

that we open heaven's gates.

Everything we need, we already have.

Lack comes from fear.

When you know you are complete,

you give up searching the external world for your needs.

 Surrender is the first step into freedom.

 

*****

 



Holding love loosely

“Love one another, but make not a bond of love:

Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.”  

 

― Kahlil Gibran

 

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Standing tall

            

 Painted my first tote bag...

“The only person who can pull me down is myself,

and I'm not going to let myself pull me down anymore.”  

― C. Joybell

 

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Having the courage to be real

“Like a Columbus of the heart,

mind and soul I have hurled myself off the shores of my own fears

and limiting beliefs to venture far out into the uncharted territories of my inner truth,

in search of what it means to be genuine and at peace with who I really am.

I have abandoned the masquerade of living up to the expectations of others

and explored the new horizons of what it means to be truly and completely me,

in all my amazing imperfection and most splendid insecurity.”  

 

― Anthon St. Maarten

 

*****



Being honest with yourself

 Got the idea for this cat from my greeting card

“There's that "margin of error" that you allow to exist in your mind, you want to give everything the benefit of the doubt, you want to look at another person and say "maybe we could be friends" and that's all well at first, but then you have to reach that point in your life, wherein you don't have time to live on the margins of error, and you have to say, "so what if there is a margin of error that exists? I don't think that this person and I could walk down the same path together, because she's like that, and I'm like this; I must relieve myself of fearing the error, the 'what could have been'." You know, sometimes we can be so afraid of the "what could have been" that we overlook the right here and now! And end up forsaking who we are and what makes us happy, and what we want and don't want! There is an error that takes place; when living too much for the "what could have been." There comes a time when you must give YOURSELF the benefit of the doubt! Know thyself...

C. Joybell 

*****

Saying goodbye to guilt

 

Guilt is a method we use to cause harm to ourselves. For instance if you were abused as a child and today beat yourself up with guilt over things you've done in the past, you have continued the pattern of abuse. Guilt has no purpose!!! If you refuse to accept guilt in your life, there will be no need for punishment. The abuse cycle is then broken.

 

This also means we won't be pointing fingers at others either. Instead we take responsibility for our part in every situation. We forgive those who have caused us harm just as we forgive ourselves for the things we've done to cause harm.

 

Don't give power to guilt. Let the past go. And if you make a mistake in the future, merely correct it without giving any power to judgment over it.

 

*****

Claiming more freedom

 

There is freedom in becoming desireless. Being desireless means we let go of all our attachments...our attachment to people, things, and circumstances. It also includes our attachment to getting our way. When we give up trying force life and let it unfold naturally, we are truly free.

One of the things I know I am still attached to is food. Both my partner and I are not extravagant people but when it comes to food, we splurge.

Over a year ago, I got sick for several months and had to give up just about everything I loved; eating in restaurants, coffee, chocolate, sugar, pizza, spaghetti...It was hard at first, but I discovered that I did okay without them. Today I still have an attachment to food but it doesn't have the strong hold it used to because I know now I can let go.  

 

******

 

 

The bug knows intuitively how to live and what it's purpose is. It doesn't get up every day obsessing about this or that, complaining, worrying, feeling resentful because it doesn't get what it wants. Until we let go of our old conditioned thinking, we will be a prisoner to our desires. And by giving in to desire, there will never be enough of anything.

 

*****

 

A special message to you from the Universe-

keep life simple. Chaos is merely a smoke screen for those who are afraid to look deeper at themselves.

A false sense of belonging

Sometimes in life we are called to do the very thing we're afraid of. One thing I fear is rejection. Being different, being true to myself, is still a stretch for me. I spent most of life trying to please others, to fit in, to be what others wanted me to be. But I lost myself in the process.

 

The last few months I have been in a situation that I would have done anything to avoid in the past. I took a strong stand for something I believe in. It has not made me popular...quite the opposite.  I could avoided a lot of judgement and rejection by playing the old game of " I will pretend not to see what I see and know what I know so you like me". I have worked too hard on myself to go blind ever again. I'm not desperate anymore to belong. I'm not willing to disconnect from myself. Too high a price to pay for a false sense of belonging.

 

 This has not been a picnic. It has been painfully uncomfortable and I've wanted to give up. But something deep in me has said to persevere...to not give into fear. And I haven't. I can see already how much I have gained from this experience...these bittersweet lessons about trusting myself...looking rejection in the face rather than cowering. I will never be the same. And for that, I am truly grateful.

 

******

 

 

She pushed beyond old limiting beliefs

and opened her mind

to new ideas.

Her fear couldn’t thrive in a space

insulated with faith.

*****

"I am free to be who I am"

She flung her arms wide open

Her days were filled with fun and adventure.

 

She let go of old restrictive thinking

 

and played fluidly like a

 

carefree child.

*****

Lunch yesterday with some wonderful women...

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In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter,
for in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. 


~Kahlil Gibran

******

 

 

 

"My heart is open"

 



Looking deeper at ourselves

We can't transform our lives through our intellect. Intellect opens the door to new possibilities, but to get results, we have to remove the barriers that prevent us from deeply learning all the wonderful ideas that wise teachers such as Eckhart Tolle and Louise L Hay offer. In other words, change comes from doing our inner working.

For example, if you don't feel worthy, all the reading material in the world won't change that belief about yourself. If you want to love yourself more, you first have to be able to identify the wounded part of you that doesn't feel good enough. It's a place you got stuck..perhaps in childhood.

Being able to see your wounded-ness is the first step...
 

I admit that looking deeper into myself wasn't fun at first. Today though, I love the journey. I'm not afraid to look at anything about myself. My goal is to be whole. To be whole, I have to be willing to heal all that isn't. The more work I do, the happier and freer I am. These days there a feeling of bliss in me. Without a shadow of doubt, I know it's a direct result of the work I've been doing.

 

I hope you find the strength and courage to learn everything there is to know about yourself. That's where your power lies.
 

*****

The world is perfect. As you question your mind, this becomes more and more obvious.
Mind changes, and as a result, the world changes. A clear mind heals everything that needs
to be healed. It can never be fooled into believing that there is one speck out of order.

 

Byron Katie

 

*****

"There is nothing I can't heal"

Becoming a butterfly

 

I found this little guy crawling up my pant leg. It was a reminder that I'm a caterpillar at the moment too...going though an uncomfortable situation that's necessary for my growth...an opportunity to learn something new...but in learning something new, I have to go through the process which includes pain, self-awareness, more pain, then eventually transformation. For right now, I'm still a caterpillar.

 

*****

Most of us know the story about the well-meaning man who found a cocoon of a butterfly and after watching it struggle for awhile, decided to help it along by snipping the cocoon open. The butterfly then emerged, but it's wings were shriveled. The butterfly was never able to fly!

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening was forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If we went through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us.

We would not be as strong as what we could have been.

We could never fly!

*****

FYI- I wrote this last year. I wanted to share it again!!!

 

In our lives, change is unavoidable, loss is unavoidable.

In the adaptability and ease with which we experience change,

lies our happiness and freedom."

 

 —Buddha

 

"Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered,

you will never grow."

 

—Ralph Waldo Emerson

"I am always changing, evolving, growing.

For this, I am grateful."